Friday, November 25, 2011

no dia em que a gente come como os suinos.

Right now, I am thankful for good family who take care of me so much, a few friends that mean a lot to me, and lots of TEA. I am thankful for that song: Come Thy Fount and Christmas music.
I am thankful for my health. 
I am thankful for that one game my family always plays together (and that I won a round of tonight): Settlers of Catan. For a desk--really it's been too long since I've had a desk--it is so wonderful; for the good night's sleep I've had two nights in a row and for stuffing (really, stuffing is one of the best foods that God ever invented).
Seriously, so blessed. 

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Como segurar um trabalho

How to get a job--a six step process:

1. Complain about not having a real job.
2. Apply to every job you can think of.
3. Apply to the jobs you never thought of but eventually did because you already applied to all the other jobs you thought of first (like over 70).
4. Complain some more about not having a real job or having any interviews.
5. Write a blog post venting your frustrations with not having a real job.
6. Apply to a completely random job someone told you about at a clinical research facility, get a call back the next day, an interview the next day and a job offer for a full-time position the next day.

Done and done.

Bottom line: I have a real job. I start on Monday. It only took 3 months of solid complaining and a lot a lot a lot of hard work.

There's hope for me after all.


Monday, October 17, 2011


Please bless...

I need a job desperately. I have a part-time nanny job, and let me tell you: nannying in Utah sucks because Utah parents are CHEAP and they want all the advantages of an experienced nanny for the hourly price of what they pay the 12 yr old young woman in their ward to watch their kids on date night. I mean, taking care of children is great. Kids are GREAT. But when the compensation is such that it hardly pays your bills then it is not worth it.

So that brings me back to the fact that I need a job desperately. I'm a young, college grad. Should be pretty easy right? Wrong. In the past month, I have EASILY applied for OVER 60 jobs. Would you like to know how many call-backs I have received? One. Out of 60.


Sorry, I am just a little (very) frustrated. You see, I live with my parents (Living with parents can be cool for like a month or two. Read: FREE RENT. But after almost a year back home with the parental units, I am going a little bonkers. Think: I've been living 'on my own' for a while now. I want to be an adult. Living with my parents makes me feel like I am a teenager again. Plus, I want to not be living surrounded by all the boxes of "on my own" stuff that I've accumulated over the years. i.e. Pots, pans, towels, sheets, blankets, etc). I am currently going to school to be a midwife (Cool right, except for those nasty payments that get charged to my credit card every month). I work 20 hours a week that BARELY pays for my schooling, let alone gas and other expenses (And gives me no incentive to love my life).

I just want to have a job. I want to live on my own again. I want to be able to pay for my life.

Please give me an awesome job. Please QUALIFY ME FOR SUCH A JOB. Such is the plea of my generation.


Monday, July 11, 2011

a bosque sagrado

Have you ever been to the Sacred Grove in Palmyra, New York, also the location of the famed Hill Cumorah Pageant (make sure your volume is turned up when you go to this link... )? Ya know, that oh-so-important place where Mormon founder Joseph Smith had his First Vision where he saw Jesus Christ and Heavenly Father and found the Golden Plates and translated the Book of Mormon? Growing up on the Eastern Seaboard, I had the opportunity to visit this site many a time with family and friends, and I'll admit that it has lost it's flare to me as a special place. This is why I wasn't very excited when JB expressed a desire to visit Palmyra to see "pageant" (not "the pageant," but just "pageant") and go to the Sacred Grove. Well, if you've never been, you should go. And this weekend we headed up to experience, what I like to call, Mormon Palooza.
JB made contact with Bob Parrot, who is the forester in charge of caring for the Sacred Grove and Hill Cumorah. We got to spend the greater part of Saturday morning with Bob walking around in the Sacred Grove. It was amazing to hear about this place that I have grown up, not only hearing about, but also visiting, from a very, very different but important perspective. I learned about it's ecological history and how it's being taken care of today. I loved the experience. Seeing the Sacred Grove as a sacred space, not because of the First Vision, but because it was already a place where you feel the spirit and character of the forest and recognize it as sacred. Bob said, and I completely agree, that Joseph chose the Sacred Grove because it was already a special place where he felt safe and loved, where he felt the Spirit.
(JB is blogging here about sacred spaces and he will be posting about his experience soon, so you should check it out.)

Oh yeah, Pageant was pretty great too. I only fell asleep once. :P

We took Rt. 20 home. Do this some time in your life. It is a beautiful drive through the Finger Lakes area and through rolling hills filled with farms, vineyards and quaint antique and Amish shops.

Monday, May 16, 2011

media social esta destruindo a minha vida social--

I've been over-stimulated by social media as of late. By blogging about it I'm only proving my point. As if FB, twitter, Pinterest, reader and Instagram weren't enough, do I really need to blog? Isn't that just perpetuating the problem? But really, I don't think it's a problem. I feel like I'm finding a good balance. I've stopped using my phone when I drive. I don't bring my phone with me to the great outdoors.

I can't wait to move to the woods and cook for a bunch of foresters for the summer. Do you have any suggestions for recipes?

Sunday, February 27, 2011

as vezes discurso na minha igreja

I gave this talk today in my branch. Please enjoy:

Good afternoon brothers and sisters. Last week in Sunday School, we discussed Matthew 5. We recognize this chapter as Jesus’ infamous Sermon on the Mount. As we enter this chapter, we see our radical elder brother setting the record straight with his disciples as to what was expected of them from Him. I love this chapter. I believe that as Christians, it highlights our moral responsibility to put away any sort of social hierarchy and advocate love and equality among our sisters and brothers. I believe it shows us a way of living that, if implemented, would revolutionize our individual lives and communities. This chapter teaches us that salvation not only lies in our outward actions, but also with the heavier weighted inward thoughts. It teaches us how our interactions with our fellow brothers and sisters must be: full of love and less of preconceived judgments.
Alas, my talk today is NOT about the Sermon on the Mount, but I would, as a side note, recommend you to reread this beautiful manifesto and staple of the gospel by our Savior. I would, however like you to remember the closing verse of Matthew 5, where Jesus leaves us with a daunting invitation. He says that we need to “be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect” (Matt 5:48). In this case, the Greek translation of the word perfect means complete, finished and fully developed. I have often pondered this invitation. Even in my most valiant attempts, I find myself in particular to be a very selfish and prideful human; I am in no way finished or complete. What is interesting to me is that this invitation infers a process to go through rather than something we miraculously become. Sometimes the word perfect is used interchangeably with the word righteous and it is on this word that I would like to focus the subject of my talk. I wish to first discuss how we define righteousness. I would then like to categorize righteousness into three important relationships. I will then like to talk about how by nurturing these relationships we can cultivate a perfection of our very own.
First, how do we define righteousness? We call Jesus Christ the Son of Righteousness. Christ is the son of God, so we can assume that righteousness is an attribute of God. The word righteousness is a word composed of a plethora of other words: integrity, upright, just, innocent, true, and sincere. It is a moral and ethical duty to do right. When we are righteous we know our actions are pleasing to God. In the Old Testament, we understand righteousness to be a result of keeping the commandments, or doing rightly as part of a covenant relationship with God. As a person met the demands of hers or his social relationships this person was thought to be a righteous being. In the New Testament, righteousness is changed a bit with the introduction or emphasis that Christ puts on love, faith and mercy. Although the OT understanding is still recognized, faith and love for God becomes the motivating factor of doing right. As a person lives with faith in God and does His will, she or he is reckoned righteous by God.
I do not think it is very easy to be righteous and so I do not use the word lightly when I say someone is righteous—indeed, I would say that there aren’t many people in this world who I would assign this title to. For me, she or he would have to be saint-like to be deemed righteous. Perhaps that is why I think it appropriate that Christ is referred to as the Son of Righteousness, or as Righteousness himself. God is righteous because he is not only right, but because he does the right thing and because He puts right things that are wrong. Is not our purpose on Earth to “know the only true God and Jesus Christ” (John 17:3)—or to know Righteousness? Understanding what it means to be righteous is understanding eternal life and true happiness. Just look up righteous or righteousness in the Topical Guide, I promise you that you will find reference after reference saying that those who were righteous were happy. When we make righteousness become the working principle in all our relationships we develop a character like God’s.
Righteousness can be developed by doing right in the relationships we find ourselves in. There are three different relationships I would like to talk about: first, with our Heavenly Father and Mother—or God; second, with the Earth; and third with people. First, righteousness as it pertains to God and our relationship with Him. In a righteous relationship with God we are doing what is right, or we are following the commandments. We regard our relationship with God as a priority, as sacred and as real. In this regard we faithfully devote ourselves to be like God. We believe him when he says he will make us clean if we repent. I do not believe that simply following the commandments will get us an in with God though. The nature or quality of our relationship with God is a manifestation of our love and faith in him. It is a manifestation of the trust we have in him, in Christ, in repentance and grace--all that makes the Atonement real. Remember, to be perfect is to be fully developed, and our relationship with God is just one of the many we need to do right by, albeit a very important one.
Second, is our relationship with the Earth. Our interaction with the Earth and responsibility to do right by Her is a duty we do not often think of as a moral or religious responsibility. We see no commandment that says, “Do not litter,” or “renew, reuse, recycle” or “cut back on your carbon usage” or “reduce monoculture crops” or “eat meat sparingly” (oh, wait, I think that one may be out there already…). To me, pollution and the excessive overuse and disrespect for the Earth’s resources is just as sinful and hurtful to God and Mother Earth as it is when we lie, cheat or steal. Perhaps not a sin of commission—most of us are not actively destroying our Mother Earth, but a sin of omission by not doing anything to keep our beautiful earthly home clean, respected, healthy and beautiful. What kind of relationship do you have with the soil, the trees or the air you breathe? May I invite you cultivate this relationship righteously? Start a garden, recycle, drive less, walk more, buy less, learn where your food comes from and recognize what it is, get involved with your community and get educated.
Third is our relationship with the people around us. We have only to refer to the Sermon on the Mount to get the idea Christ wants us to have. In Matthew 5:38-44 it reads:
38 Ye have heard that it hath been said, An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth: 39 But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also. 40 And if any man will sue thee at the law, and take away thy coat, let him have thy cloke also. 41 And whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain. 42 Give to him that asketh thee, and from him that would borrow of thee turn not thou away. 43 Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbor, and hate thine enemy. 44 But I say unto you Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;
Here we read of a drastic change in the social understanding of the Law as Christ infuses mercy, love, respect, and a pacifist outlook into what before was a black and white understanding of right and wrong. Turn then to Mosiah 4:26:
...for the sake of retaining a remission of your sins from day to day, that ye may walk guiltless before God —I would that ye should impart of you substance to the poor, every man according to that which hath, such as feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, visiting the sick and administering to their relief, both spiritually and temporally, according to their wants.
I love this scripture because it charges us to be charitable with our less fortunate brethren. It charges us to put away pride and in humility give what has been blessed to us. The seriousness of this verse is qualified by the first phrase, “for the sake of retaining a remission of your sins from day to day.” And lastly to John 13:34-35:
34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. 35 By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.
Such a simple phrase, “love one another” and yet, I think it is the most neglected. Sure we love our family and our friends, and our hearts go out to people in need all over the world, but is that enough? It is very clear to me what our relationship with our fellowmen should be like if we want to deem it righteous and the word is love. I was excited when the 3-fold mission of the church became a 4-fold mission. If any of you are not unfamiliar with this addition, they are now: proclaim the gospel, redeem the dead, perfect the saints and now, care for the poor and the needy. While I appreciate our churches efforts to extend its helping hands to people in need around the world, I worry that many, including myself, let this be the excuse that keeps us from being “anxiously engaged in a good cause” ourselves, in our own communities (D&C 58:27-28). In the Doctrine and Covenants 58:27-28, we learn that we not only need to be involved, but that it is up to us individually to use our agency to choose to become involved in righteousness. When we chose to live our lives righteously we can as Ghandi said, “Be the change [that we] want to see in the world.”
My favorite Beatitude is found in Matthew 5:6, “Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.” I love this scripture because it shows us what happens as we lfill ourselves and strive to be righteous: that we will be filled. Think back of our definition of perfect—to be complete, finished and fully developed. I believe that as we care for the relationships we have with God, the Earth and its humanity, and try to do right by them, we shall become filled. We shall be filled with happiness, the Spirit and love. I am in no way close to this type of nirvana, and so I feel somewhat like the pot calling the kettle black here, but these are some of the things I have discovered about what it means to be righteous. I hope that my words have touched some of your hearts. I testify that we will not come to know righteousness by ourselves, but it is only through the Atonement and love that we are able to make righteousness the working principal in our personal lives. In Romans 10:3-4 it says,
3 For they being ignorant of God’s righteousness, and going about to establish their own righteousness have not submitted themselves unto the righteousness of God. 4 For Christ is the end of the law for righteousness to every one that believeth.
I emphasize again that we cannot do this by ourselves, and for this I am grateful for my Savior, who, by example, taught us how to live by righteousness and who comes in the meridians of my life to help bring balance and peace to me as I strive to attain righteousness. I testify that, as children of our Heavenly Parents, we will come to know them and become more like them, as we hunger and thirst after righteousness in the relationships we cultivate. I know God loves us. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Monday, February 21, 2011

hoje retornei pra meu juventude.

Today I went through what was left of my childhood and subsequent teen and young adult life. Mementos. I love mementos and I keep everything. I have every handout from every class or activity that I have ever been too. I have movie ticket stubs, plane ticket stubs, museum ticket stubs. I have pictures. I learned that I have journal entries dating back to 1993--I was seven--to the present day and they fill an entire box (I'm afraid/determined to look at them in the next couple of days). I have dolls--even the ones that I so cruelly mistreated and gave horrible haircuts and dye jobs to; I have my mother's dolls from the 60's, with outfits my grandmother made for them. I have ponies and bears and puppies and, yes, I have Beany Babies. I have every note I have have ever taken in every class I have ever attended. I have every card ever written to me. I have every school paper I have ever written. I have vocab words. I have pennies from the 50's. I have pesos from the 50's. I have heirloom jewelry. I have baby clothes. I have a lot of things.

I threw most of it away. No, really. MOST of it. I filled a huge black, drawstring garbage bag full of stuff and put it out to the trash.
I don't need to keep notes from school.
I don't need to keep the birthday cards signed by distant relatives for my 9th birthday.
I don't need ticket stubs. I don't.
According to my eight year old self, I wanted to live on the beach next to a jungle with lots of animals in it. I wanted to swim with dolphins daily.
I used to write poems--POEMS--about love, flowers, the wind and trees when I was eleven.
I read, voraciously, weird books like the Bronte sisters books, classics like Anne of Green Gables and Nancy Drew. I kept lists of all the books I have ever read.
I was a driven, self-confident, attention-seeking, creative little human.

I found out that I liked to set goals for myself a lot, especially long-term ones. I probably found 3 or 4 lists that were supposed to be what/where I wanted to be in the future, including a time capsule one I wrote in September, 2000. I opened it today, five months late. Just an FYI on that: I have studied abroad, I have been to Italy, I have served a mission, I have learned another language, I have graduated college. I have not gotten married and I do not have three kids.
(REALLY??? THREE??? When did my past self think I would find the time to do all that and still somehow have three babies by age 24???)

Thursday, January 20, 2011

a mulher...

Woman’s Rights

Gentlemen and Ladies: --Having been called upon to write upon the subject of woman’s rights, I have prepared a few words in response to the invitation and as a true expression of my individual feelings. Woman’s rights seems to me to be of so much importance that every woman should be interested in it, and should most earnestly endeavor to contend for it in a proper way and manner. There are only a few women who have their rights and who is it that deprives them of these? It is our brother man. I often think that man has uncalled for and unrighteous authority over those of the “weaker sex” as he is pleased to term woman., but everything that goes wrong is in many, yes, in most cases put upon woman’s shoulders, for her to carry as best she can.

I believe in honoring man in his own place but at the same time I do believe his wife should have equal rights with him. I am pleased to see the ladies striving to shake off the chains that have so long enslaved us and I shall rejoice to see the day when freedom’s banner for woman shall wave not only over this our fair land, but over all the world. When that day comes many evils will be trampled beneath our feet that today are tolerated by man.

I am in every sense of the word an advocate and a defender of woman’s rights, and I trust the day will shortly come when woman’s cause will triumph and she will stand free and untrammelled by any of the restraints now imposed upon her sex.

Sarah B. Layton

Kaysville, Utah.

The Woman's Exponent 1891-09-01 vol. 20 no. 5

Thank you Sarah, but we're still working for this equality you're talking about.